You Have Beautiful Lipstick

by Julie Erdelyi 

What do greetings really do for us? They are a social convention we expect, but one that has become so routine—a head nod, a single word—that I wonder why we keep using them. Of course greetings are a social courtesy we extend to others, but they have the potential to be so much more.

I teach children who have autism. The experiences with my students have shown me how important a greeting can be when it rises above the ordinary. It’s then that the greetings become an acknowledgement that we are thought about and cared about by others. Let me tell you what I mean.

First there was Jackie, a teenage girl with Retts Syndrome, who would rock and smile and yell enthusiastically when I said hello to her. Here she was, unable to walk, unable to speak and she was so happy to see me. I thought, “I have got to lighten up! There is not a single challenge I face that comes anywhere close to what Jackie copes with every day and she is smiling at me.”